We all carry excess baggage and the suitcases just keep piling up filled with disappointments, broken hearts and anger. As a woman I’ve settled for men who make demands up front about what they expect out of a relationship and I’ve foolishly agreed only to realize the only thing they deliver is disappointment.
I remember watching the movie “Pretty Woman” and thinking how glorious is that! She’s a prostitute and he is pulling up in a limo with flowers and climbing a ladder even though he’s afraid of heights.
My ladder must be broken or I must be dealing with men who suffer from severe acrophobia since no one is climbing anything as of late. I am not getting flowers let alone someone willing to fix the ladder to my heart. I’m not a prostitute and surely I deserve to be loved but some of the guys I’ve dated make me feel like I am no more than a “booty call” and they don’t give me the impression they even know what a ladder is.
I guess I’ve allowed this to happen for a few reasons and I don’t blame them for treating me this way since I’ve projected myself in a negative light and with a lack of confidence. It’s easy for any man to think I would accept just about anything but the fact is the only thing I want to have pimped these days is my blog.
I’m tired of selling myself short and running away from a healthy relationship. As you know I’ve worked hard to fix what was broken but I need a handyman to finish the job.
I really love flowers and I’ve always wanted someone to show their interest in a grand gesture, being a hopeless romantic has its down side especially when you keep meeting men who can’t even be bothered with small talk or answering a text.
I’m tired of the “game”. I didn’t understand the term “player” but I do now because it’s obviously a game they play. I once felt I had to venture to the dark side but I want to rest on the side of the road for a while. I can’t be bothered with someone who is unavailable emotionally anymore.
Here are the rules of the game as I’ve come to know them: accept anything and don’t question anything. I for one feel quite certain that even at my age I can meet someone who is more interested in the prize than the game itself.
Yes I said it – I am a prize. It took me a long time to look past my weight, the wrinkles, and the flaws I see in the mirror every day. I thought these made me unlovable but with the help of amazing friends I have come to realize I’m perfect and unique just the way I am no better or worse than anyone else just exactly right. The men I’ve dated won’t climb a ladder; they won’t give me flowers because they are the wrong men; a complete waste of my energy and time.
I’ve decided to open my eyes and heart again. I’m not saying that I am desperately seeking a soul mate, I’m simply indicating that my current lifestyle choices i.e. dating losers, has come to a close.
Here is a wonderful quote from my co-worker Sarah “It’s like wanting caviar but choosing to eat out of a dumpster instead”. We choose mediocrity for fear of ending up alone but the undeniable choice of settling remains a soul-sucking experience. The truth is I’ve settled for far too long. Done are the days of dating men who offer a list of likes and dislikes on a first date.
My promise to myself is that until he finds me or I find him I will no longer be a dumpster digger, I’m holding out for the caviar. Wanted: a decent man willing to fix a broken ladder and climbing up to claim his prize.