Things come at you a mile a minute, you are sitting pretty and life is coasting by and all of a sudden WHAM!!!! One thing after another weighs you down physically and literally as the pounds creep back up the scale.
You try to get back on track but responsibilities, job, children, parents, friends make demands you can’t fulfill. Everything just magnetically becomes a ball in your mind, you try to decipher it piece by piece but it keeps melding together.
“No matter what happens, duck when I say duck”…The truth is sometimes we think we are at the right place, surrounded by the right people and doing the right thing. In your heart you feel this must be all there is but deep down in that hole inside your gut you know this is not where I am meant to be?
In the last few years I’ve had a few setbacks and each time I have stepped back further and further from taking a leap of faith in any way, shape or form.
I’ve tried to find the answer and even bought a few self-help books. I also tried talking to family and friends but the problem is not knowing what is the problem is to begin with.
So I thought I should take a step towards figuring things out by seeking some professional help. I’m not depressed – well maybe a bit. I’m happy – well maybe not all the time. I’m energetic – well maybe not quite my bubbly self.
Counselling is a great tool, it used to be frowned upon years ago but it really depends on how you use it. The fact is if you can’t find the answer on your own then you need professional help, it’s not a sign of weakness but in fact a sign of strength to admit needing help.
The big thing for me is that I am all over the place now like a slinky ball that is forever bouncing up and down and side to side. By talking about what is on my mind I can with the help of a counselor decipher what is holding me back from making the changes I need to make.
One of my favourite experiences with a counselor was years ago when I first came to Toronto and I was depressed and feeling lonely. Toronto is a big city that can seem very cold when you are a newcomer. The counselor had a huge Yogi Bear in his office which was very comforting since my nickname as a kid was BooBoo (smarter than the average bear).
Fear is my biggest barrier at the moment, it probably means I have to make a huge decision affecting my life and that isn’t always easy. In a way this chaos is my excuse for delaying the inevitable. Help I need somebody by The Beatles lyrics’ are spot on…here is an excerpt from the lyrics below.
“When I was younger, so much younger than today, I never needed anybody’s help in any way. But now these days are gone, I’m not so self-assured, now I find I’ve changed my mind, I’ve opened up the doors. Help me if you can, I’m feeling down and I do appreciate you being ’round. Help me get my feet back on the ground, won’t you please, please help me?”