Thanks For The Memories Boys !!


Cover of "Pretty Woman [Blu-ray]"

Do you remember the movie #Pretty Woman with #Julia Roberts and #Richard Gere? In the movie Julia plays a prostitute who meets a millionaire who ends up making an honest woman out of her.

This morning on my favourite radio station #Kiss92.5FM they were discussing this movie from a man’s perspective and it was interesting to hear the judgement they held and the lack of belief that a prostitute could turn over another leaf.

Everyday people change; they give up #addictions, go from gangster to preacher, from zero to hero.  Why is it so hard to believe that a woman who has chosen a life of debauchery could change?  What you don’t see in the movie is what brought her to prostitution in the first place.

I would never say I consider myself a prostitute but since my divorce I haven’t exactly been a saint either.  Certain things we encounter in life are so devastating that they break us at the very core of our soul, in my case the betrayal and lies led me to numbness, emotional unavailability, cougarism, hurting others before I get hurt and developing a new persona.

I was a ticking time bomb ready to explode any time things didn’t go my way, leaving before I would be left and pushing people away when they got too close.  I shut down my values, my heart and jumped in with the attitude “the player is gonna get played.”  In fact with tears in my eyes this is what I told a friend of my husband’s in anger.

It would be hard to sit here and blame the men that crossed my path in those 7 or 8 years as they were unaware of my conniving nature and intention to be with them for their lack of insight into the human psyche.  I was settling for what I could handle emotionally and spiritually.

For many years I lived on friends-with-benefits, booty calls, short-lived romances and one night stands, these were my fix to the addiction of sabotaging and hurting myself. It was all that I could handle since I feared putting my heart through the pain again and putting my pocketbook through that horrendous loss of income.

Some of the younger men I dated made perfect play things since they relied on their sexual prowess way more than having an interest in furthering their knowledge.  Consumed by conquest and the expensive sneakers on their feet and not the bigger picture of where that would lead them.

Oh! a few times I acted like a counselor I couldn’t help myself, trying to guide them the right way but they were too set in their ways already destined to live a life of deceit.

Obituary:  I wish to inform you of the passing of Gail’s promiscuity.  It happened overnight it seemed but was actually a work in progress for over a year.  Her cougar outfits will be exhibited at the local Goodwill along with her whip.  Anyone wishing to send condolences can do so below in the comment section.

Birth Announcement:  I would like to introduce you to Gail, she is gorgeous with blond hair and green eyes, she loves herself and loves talking about herself.  She is eccentric, honest and sensual.  She values family, friends, love, humanitarianism, laughter and honesty,

I’m no longer looking for a quick fix, my addiction to numb myself is over and as I move forward to re-branding myself in the current context I am looking for meaningful connections that bring great memories to my life and not just notches on my belt.

We always accuse men of playing games, cheating and having many sexual encounters but what if they knew they were not necessarily the players but in fact the playees.  Many women today choose this lifestyle and I am certainly not going to judge it since I lived it.  I am just choosing to move on.

When I do meet someone, I think I will give him all the posts from my blog to read.  I am not ashamed of who I was or who I am.

I am still seeking prince charming and if he has a problem with my sordid past or feels that I am damaged goods then good luck finding a pristine no baggage, no past type of gal and don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Thanks for the memories boys :))

13 comments

  1. Your writing just gets stronger and stronger and this is a fantastic post. Goodbye promiscuity! Enjoy the deeper connections you find!

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  2. Hey Gail! You will appreciate this since we both blogged on self-esteem. One lecture I heard said that the follow-up movie to Pretty Woman (unoffically) was the horror flick Julia did afterwards called Sleeping with the Enemy. Can a prostitute go from a fantasy marriage to domestic abuse? Yes, if her self-esteem hasn’t changed and improved. I had to think about that awhile…

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    • Hi Lara,
      The before and after is always in question but it’s the behavior during that people remember. In my case my self-esteem is actually better than it has ever been. I’ve stopped looking at myself as a naive victim and now that my sordid past is behind me I am comfortable with who I am today. Strong, in touch with my emotions, sexuality and spirituality. Thanks so much for the comment I will make sure to go check out your post as well.

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  3. You simply blow me away! This is an incredible post. An invaluable post to someone ready to hear it… we’ll have to make sure it gets no dust on it! You. Are. Magnificent.

    I remember. I look back and I think that I was simply trying to dull all the agony and stay so “busy” …I wouldn’t have any time to think. I remember and I have been called “damaged goods.” Huh. (Last time I checked, everything was still in working order! LOL)

    Keep on keeping on, Gail. You are an inspiration and you ARE making a difference.

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  4. I read this from my phone earlier today, I am unable to comment from it though. This post was amazing, honest and open… I have been wanting to do one of these posts myself, I have held back due to not wanting people to judge me. I don’t judge others and I wish more people could understand that we really are not our past… I was raped and demeaned by my ex husband, so when I finally was free, I went a little wild… trying to do whatever I could to feel better about myself. I have come through this, I have grown… basically it makes me more compassionate. Thank you for the amazing post Gail.

    I want to post more on the Google site you set up, I wish there was a way to have it automatically post there, do you know if there is a way?

    Also, I will be having surgery on Thursday and I may not be commenting for a week or so afterwards… I look forward to your next post…

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  5. Good for you. I believe that anyone who is trying to grow, is on the right path. If you are happy where you are now, then you’ve chosen wisely. I agree with Amber-Lee (AlaskaChick), it was a fantastic post.

    I stopped dating seven years ago. I just got fed up and since then I’ve been remarkably happy. There is much to do in life and much to enjoy, if one isn’t chasing something they really don’t want anyway.

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  6. Hey Gail,

    Now it’s the day you look back and see how confident you are about yourself to claim as a brand new person with a new vision 🙂

    The review about the movie is coming from a different eye 🙂 It’s true that people see things differently according to their experiences.

    I haven’t had much connections with people who has to go through a lot of difficulties. I mean such addictions or so. There were some but they are still spending their lives in the same way they were used to. A change would be not easy but it’s just until you make a habit of it. You need to be honest with yourself.

    I don’t know much about your past life and I don’t care whatever it is. I believe things will really work on you and you are courage enough to take the challenge dear 🙂 Take it and be the inspiration to others too. You will 🙂

    Cheers…

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