The Long and Short of IT

Last week as I sat on the subway on my way to work an article caught my attention hidden in the middle section of the paper.  Here is the link to the article which basically confirmed what women knew all along: size matters.


From a young age women are made aware of the sensitivity of a man’s ego in regards to his appendage and we abide by an unwritten rule not unlike “bros before hoes.”

The truth is whether you are feeling a wee bit under the average; I can only speak to what has made me feel a bit less in the medial lines.

Women might not have to worry about the long and short of it but we do constantly obsess over our weight.  I certainly have felt overlooked many times by the opposite sex due to my size.

In my early twenties after going through a hysterectomy that took away any chance I had of conceiving a child again, a guy I was in a relationship with indicated he preferred having me face away from him during intercourse because he didn’t want to see my dangling stomach.

I guess you must be sensing now that I am not feeling sorry for any man who wasn’t given the proper length.

Our mothers were increasingly aware of sparing their young boy’s feelings but the same wasn’t the case with girls.  We were compared, taunted and expected to showcase our personalities if our bodies did not reflect a perfect figure.

I started worrying about my weight at the age of eleven, at the time I was pre-pubescent girl and quite developed.  From that age I became aware of my stature and how displeasing it was.  Boys would tease, girls would exclude and family members would try to silence my pain with more food.

All the while I starved myself, compensated with sexuality and self-abuse to hide my feelings of inadequacy in the appeal department.

So to be frank, size truly matters on both counts.  I personally commend women who in the past got married without trying on the merchandise.  There must have been some big surprises in some cases or should I say small ones.

The invention of the vibrator and dildo should be an indication to men of what we were lacking.  I strongly believe women are better at camouflaging their sexual drive but that certainly doesn’t mean they don’t have it.

Ironically more women undergo weight-related surgeries around the world than men go through “penile enhancements.”

In some countries, a woman’s right to have an orgasm is taken away sometimes in horrific ways; I suspect it is due to inferiority complex. After all you must either have a small manhood or brain to think that a woman enjoying sexual pleasures is a bad thing.

So the long and the short of it comes down to feelings; men feel inadequate, lesser than or ill-equipped and women feel lesser than, inadequate and mad.

If you have a daughter, don’t teach her to spare a man’s feelings…teach her to care about her own feelings and to be strong.  If you have a son teach him size matters but even more important, teach him that beauty is not about size.  The beauty of a woman is her spirit, her heart and her tenacity and the fact that she will overlook your shortcomings.

One man got his appendage cut off and became famous; in fact, no one will ever forget Lorena Bobbit.

How many women are butchered every year due to weight loss surgeries, develop eating disorders, commit suicide and are left with scarred and mutilated bodies.

In the end what is important is treating others with individuality and looking beyond the physical differences.

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  1. Know who Lorena Bobbit is gives our Age away without trying. Don’t know what ‘bros before hoes’ mean, bust I assume it’s an American way of speaking. Your article is interesting, very likely to be discomforting for a man to read, but interesting nonetheless. Cheers.


  2. For different reasons, I’ve never been paranoid about either one of these issues.

    But I can sure understand how someone WOULD be! Advertising plays off of these fears 24/7 (okay, the guys mostly get their ads at 2 in the morning, but still…). The message seems to be that if you DON’T feel paranoid, well, maybe you should!

    Living to be comfortable in my own skin has been a lifelong struggle for me, too. I don’t think i know anyone who’s found it to be easy.


  3. One thing I can always count on lady is that you NEVER pull any punches with you posts! Well written and grat choice of pictures. And for the record, the guy that wanted you to turn around is a dirtbag! My ex hated her stomach and the fact that it sagged and tried to hide it from me many times, I didn’t let her. There are many mutual reasons we are exes, but her looks had nothing to do with it. Great job as always!


  4. I love this Gail… gotta love your honesty.

    More people need to be truthful and stop sugar coating everything to make some people happy 🙂


  5. Looking at your photos, you look as though you have conquered any problems you may have had with weight. I’m overweight, but it really doesn’t concern me a lot. What irritates me are the men who are overweight and nothing to brag about in the looks department who won’t consider going out without anyone unless they’re at least 20 years younger and who aren’t overweight.


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