Am I Happy?


I was thinking about the fact that lately I feel really blah!

I did a Google search on elements of happiness and they pointed to 20 things that happy people have in common (listed below at the bottom of this post).

The interesting thing is I scored 19 out of 20.  I need to work on number 17 which is to make exercise a priority. Exercise stimulates more than just weight loss, it improves the mood, boosts energy levels, promotes better sleep and improves the sex life.

I need to stop procrastinating, find an exercise I enjoy and get motivated to do it for all those reasons and more.  The biggest benefit to exercise is the prevention of heart disease, that alone should motivate me.

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Why do I feel so sluggish and unmotivated?  I guess for every up there is a down and I have to accept the fact that I am not at the bubbly, enthusiastic stage in my life right now.  Does that mean I am depressed?  No – what it means is that I am currently re-assessing (I do this a lot) and my mood is reflective of my pensive state.

I do have many things in my life to feel blessed about, my daughter & grand-daughter, friends, home, work, my dog tiger but I also feel I haven’t reached the full potential of who I am.

My ex-boyfriend once said that being in a relationship with me was like the movie Ground Hog Day– re-living the same thing over and over.  I don’t think he was wrong, I go in a bit of a circle from the uppity “I am going to change the world mode” to “what can I change about myself right now mode.”

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It took me a while to accept this about myself, it took others even longer.  Those who know me well and accept the quirkiness of Gail are used to it and simply give me the room I need to evolve.

With a bad track record of choosing the wrong men, making bad decisions and being extremely impulsive and compulsive. This reflective spirit is good for me, it allows me to plan instead of reacting.

One of the decisions I’ve made is to fix the “turkey butt” I spoke about in http://gailsforum.com/2012/06/12/she-didnt-mean-it-2/.

I had a consultation with a cosmetic surgeon and we spoke about the implications of fixing the upper lip wrinkles.

I have APS which is (antiphospholipid antibody syndrome) an autoimmune disorder which causes my body to fight against itself.  In the past, surgeries have gone terribly wrong and my concern with fixing my upper lip stemmed from a fear that I would end up looking deformed.

During the consultation we looked at fillers, botox and other ways to fix this, in essence the best option and the decision was made to use Botox.  I have scheduled the appointment for November.  You can’t even imagine how much money I’ve spent on anti-wrinkle products.  Financially alone this is the better option.

I know, most of you will say you don’t see it but no matter what you say the truth is that I do, each and every time I look in the mirror all I see are these huge lines on my upper-lip.

The other decision I made is to take a renewed interest in cooking.   I once loved to cook and bake, I’ve spent the last fifteen years eating the same easy to make thing week after week and I have grown to hate food.

My grand-daughter is showing an interest in cooking and I thought this would be the perfect time to fall in love with food again.

She is a bit worried and recently said “Nana you are going to teach me how to cook?”  I guess she is a bit apprehensive about the skills I possess lol I can’t say I blame her one bit.

These are not major decisions but they do have an impact on my happiness.

The fall season is a time that brings with it a feeling of blah!  Some folks attribute this change in our mood to the ratio of daylight vs. darkness.

In some cases it could be SAD – Seasonal Affective Disorder – Although there is no specific diagnostic test for the illness, symptoms of seasonal affective disorder include tiredness, fatigue, depression, crying spells, irritability, trouble concentrating, body aches, loss of sex drive, poor sleep, decreased activity level, and overeating, especially of carbohydrates, with associated weight gain.

You might not be suffering from SAD but just feeling Blah!

So now here is the list of things happy people have in common, if you are feeling like I am it might help you to know that you are not alone.

1) They surround themselves with happy people

2) They cultivate resistance and strength

3) They TRY to be happy

4) They are mindful of “the good”

5) They appreciate simple pleasures

6) They devote some time to giving

7) They let themselves lose track of time

8) They have deeper conversations

9) They spend money on other people

10) They make a point to listen

11) They have in-person connections

12) They look on the bright side

13) They value music & the arts

14) They unplug from the world

15) They get spiritual

16) They spend time sleeping

17) They make exercise a priority

18) They laugh lol

19) They walk the walk

20) They question their happiness

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3 comments

  1. It is not always easy to be happy… I look for joy in little things…

    Gail, I hope you can find an exercise that works for you, that is what has been helping me… for me it has been walking, of course it is getting colder out so not as easy, I am joining a gym that has an amazing walking track so that I can walk/run indoors… whenever I am a little stressed, I walk and I always feel better… I am also going to take up Zumba at the same place as I think dancing and exercising would be fun… I need to to enjoy my exercise a little too or I won’t keep up with it. Sure I may have to do some exercises that are not as fun but the majority of them need to feel fun for me to maintain them… Good luck 🙂

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  2. Exercise is supposed to help a lot but at the end of the day there can be a number of reasons for unhappiness and the only way of finding out is trying various methods to see what happens. But on the other hand, do you really have to be laughing, joking, bubbly 24/7 or do we sometimes just chill out with nothing to do? Or is there a period in life when we just change from being a very bubbly person to a quiet person. I’m no expert and I don’t really know, just guessing a few things.

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