Like A Boss


My apologies for the tardiness in posting this week and lack of posting last week.  I’ve been very busy in my 9-5 job and with my other volunteering.

I read an interesting article this about a petition to ban the word Bossy in reference to girls/women.

Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg’s book Lean In sparked a major national conversation on women and leadership in the workplace. The technology executive also set up a nonprofit, Lean In, to help women strengthen their workplace confidence and skills by convening in Lean In Circles with trusted peers. One year later, Lean In has teamed up with the Girl Scouts to launch a public service campaign, Ban Bossy, to encourage everyone to think twice about using a word that Sandberg says teaches women to hold themselves back.

Sheryl Sandberg
Sheryl Sandberg

Here is a video about this issue.

The simple fact is that women are more likely to lose assertiveness and prone to be more compliant based on messages received during their upbringing.  

I remember growing up I felt I didn’t have a voice, I was always the girl with my hand up in class, ignored.  At home, it was the same, my opinions were not valued or appreciated and it just made me want to shine more…hence why I constantly love to create and start new projects.  

I did pay way too much attention to the negative comments and in fact I felt beaten with low self-esteem, a feeling of powerlessness and dark cloud over my head.  Until I realized that peer jealousy, intellectual deficiencies and gender inequality were all culprits.

Just this weekend I was at a bar/club and a guy asked me to dance while I was chatting with the bartender (a woman) and another woman sitting at the bar.  I politely declined by saying “no thank you” and he called me selfish.  I asked him “why would it make me selfish to prefer hanging out with my friends than dancing with you”.  He offered to buy me a beer, I said “not if it means I have to dance with you!”  Hahaha

I’ve been called everything from crazy, eccentric, no common sense, aggressive and of course bossy.  Isn’t it time that we start empowering girls/women to speak their minds and not be afraid to lead.

Assertiveness is not a curse.  Men should be drawn to assertive women because we are strong, within a relationship a strong woman will carry you through it with encouragement, they will be your intellectual equal when you are persevering, most importantly they will lead when someone needs to take charge. If you get offended don’t call them bossy, call them heroes for being relentless in their pursuits.

I don’t make excuses or pretend to be weak any more.  Like a boss I am the boss today and everyday.

7 comments

  1. I just heard this again. This morning onNPR. not sure ice ever called anyone bossy, but when I think of you, after reading many a post (and I mean this win the utmost respect) you aren’t bossy but you are one tough lady!

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    • Thanks Tony, I will take that as a compliment. I have realized especially this year that I don’t need to hide behind what I think people want me to be. I am tough and that is a positive trait.

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      • Gail, in all honesty, I find it a VERY positive trait. We all need someone to lean on sometimes, but we all have to be tough more often than not. You are amazing and I am glad you are realizing it!

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  2. There is such a thing as over-assertiveness, of being too demanding or nitpicking. I’m not sure that the line is in the same place for men and women, but there’s a line for people in general for me. I don’t think I’ve used the term “bossy” – maybe ever – but at a certain point, I will tell people to step down.

    Being tough in the face of adversity, meanwhile, can be a good thing.

    I’ve seen this “ban bossy” campaign and I’m curious as to where it will go…

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